30 Identical Wet Bearded Bois- 5th US Nationals (7-2)

Card draw simulator
Odds: 0% – 0% – 0% more
Derived from
None. Self-made deck here.
Inspiration for
Wet Bearded Bois II: The Moisture Project - 2nd Place DwD 5 3 1 1.0

thehumanh 168

These moist boys helped guide me to the Quarterfinals of US Nationals. I'm not sure how close it was to the event winning list (congrats to Michael!) because as far as I can tell, no high placing Drowned God deck has been posted before. It's ever so slightly misnamed, because the night before the tournament I finally took Eric Green's advice and subtracted a 3rd Old Wyk in favor of a 2nd Old Grey Gull, making an actual total of 31 damp dudes. Credit for building and testing to the mighty Khalejandro, Eric, Stefan Topfstedt, Angela Steele, and Dave Moran.

Compared to the other DG decks we saw and tested, the plot deck I landed on is slightly assertive in forgoing At the Gates in favor of almost always opening Riddle. I hit 6 Gates in 9 games (nice) and was 6/6 in flipping Riddle into them. You've got other openers if you want/need them, Exchange or LSF. Wildfire's pretty soft by itself but paired with Morghulis you're reliably able to keep the board at a level where your negative attachments have a major impact. And Vanquish is just silly- you can put your Raiders where you want them, and in the worst possible scenario it's a blank 5-8-2-5. Not bad! On the flipside, I did play it safe by including LSF over We Take Westeros, It's big crappy econ that makes up for the times your Riddle doesn't land. "Pass challenges" is also a perfectly good thing to say when you don't want to give your opponent cards. Return to the Fields is already the best defensive plot in the game, when you combine it with Ribs and Desert Raiders it can sometimes become a blowout flip.

The draw deck is pretty straight forward, all those fancy Martell attachments stall your opponent while the soggy bois get the beach party up and running. Aeron is the organizer who brings all the great snacks, Tarle the Thicc is the diligent host who's constantly checking to make sure your drink is filled. Disciples are the belligerent drunks who have already stolen your umbrella even though they clearly don't know how to use one. The Prophet knows when to bring them back to the beach for the toast, though. Old Grey Gull is the guy you absolutely don't want to go swimming with. Vince always seems to pop up with a timely anecdote at the right moment. The Apostles and Proselytes are just there to have a good time. If playing the list again I'd flip their ratio to 2 Apostles/3 Proselytes.


  1. Lucas Reed, GJ/Stag W - A tight game that Lucas led most of the way until late Disciples closed it alongside Tarle. Mean Girls victim #1.

  2. Josh Forbes, GJ/Crossing L - Another tight game that suddenly turned when Josh flipped Beyond Reproach.

  3. Sam Whitehead, Free Folk W - Sam ruled the early game. To start R3 his Marched cleared Aeron but left Tarle. I saw attachments to shut down Rattleshirt and was able to rally. Mean Girls victim #2.

  4. Aleesa Baakko, GJ/Prince W - I saw all the attachments in this game, Prince Balon was either Secret Pact'd or Condemned for the whole match. Mean Girls victim #3.

  5. Kira Reed, Bara/Wars W - Kira was forced to setup a Beggins and didn't see another. Barring and King plot slowed things but Tarle being able to marshal in spite of either plot is a big advantage. Mean Girls victim #4.

  6. Chris Schoenthal, GJ/Sun W - Mirror match where I got the better draw.

R32. Alex Esposito, Stark/Knights of the Hollow Hill W - Fun, grindy game. Alex neutralized the setup disparity early with Passing the Black Gate and Bear Island Scouts. In the middle game, he wiped my board at one point, clearing Tarle with a Ramsey/Skagos combo. The non-terminal attachments wound up being critical as always, as through multiple resets I was able to stall his power gain, and keep him off the power challenge almost entirely. Meera alone makes Stark the toughest matchup, and DGF kept her in the dead pile in the late game denying a Summer trigger.

R16. Robert Mixer, GJ/Crossing W - Another game where I just seemed to pull all the attachments, and the GJ bigs were kept in check. I think all 3 Condemneds were in play at one point, plus a Secret Pact.

R8. Dustan Archer, Stark/Crossing L - I had Tarle and a Risen in my opening hand, and so decided to set him up and try to keep him protected, and a Disciple was soon out piling up power on him. You probably read how this game ended in the FB group, but for a brief recap I'm up 14-7 entering challenges R5 with Dustan as first player. He swings intrigue with Meera, I let it go unopposed, and forgetting she's at zero strength, trigger Raider and the Disciple. Dustan misses it too in the moment, shakes my hand. I'm packing up my tokens when the mistake is pointed out to us. We roll it back. He swings Power, if I just win this on defense it's still my game, but being a bit tilted from the misplay and rollback I completely forget he still has the Military challenge coming. In my head I count crossing-claim-renown-renown-eddy- putting him at 12. I just defend, and trigger both my Raiders to take Robb and Ed's power icons, figuring I'll be able to swing back and close with 2 claim. But of course, as he's still got the Military coming it's now GG for him. I slink off to the parking lot for a warm trunk beer to soothe my nerves.

In spite of my flame out, I'm proud of how I did on the weekend, and wish I'd gotten a chance to keep the beach party going for another game or two. Massive thank yous to all my opponents for being great people, to everyone involved in organizing an awesome weekend, and most especially to the meta-mates and travelling companions who've pushed me to be a better player. I sincerely cherish all our time together.

1 comment

sonofaben 1

Very nice. Thanks for sharing!