Fools on Boats

Card draw simulator
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Normie 6

When designing a Greyjoy Farce deck, for whatever reason, I knew almost immediately what I would want to do with it--weenies with Raiding Longship, The Seastone Chair, and "The Bloody Cup". Why? Well, I guess the opportunity to do well with a weenies-only cost curve appeals to me, since it's very much not the type of deck I would normally play. And, in my experience, it is just quite rare in general to have success with a true "weenies" deck. The result is an aggressive rush-y deck that, ironically for a Greyjoy deck, often has to worry about Valar Morghulis as its greatest threat.

The strategy here is pretty straightforward, go first with Raiding Longship and do obnoxious things. You have some other ways to get unopposed challenges such as mass stealth from Saltcliffe Sailor, Theon Greyjoy (TFoA), and Grey Ghost. Support of Harlaw can give you renown or more stealth if needed and you can get extra power from Great Kraken. You can also spread keywords around your fools with Saltcliffe Sailor, multiple renown is preferred. The very high initiative of the plot deck is enabled by the extremely low cost curve, since I don't feel pressured to bother with "economy" plots.

Now to discuss a couple options for this deck that were not used. First of all, going full jank with "Florian and Jonquil" and Erik Anvil-Breaker. By all means this is probably a viable path and I saw a published decklist recently which does this. To me it is a little bit too much jank I guess, in particular, I don't like the anti-synergy of "Florian and Jonquil" with Theon Greyjoy (TFoA) and Hagen's Daughter. Another option which I did use at first was Pyke (BtB). In my experience, while this card can be impactful, it is simply too inconsistent to justify inclusion with the restrictions that most warships will be cost 2 or less and it cannot target loyal cards (without the non-loyal condition I may have included it as a one-of, just because it can still be strong when triggering itself on first being marshaled).

Plots:

  • Naval Superiority: Another card that is enabled by the low cost curve, and with the printing of The Maiden, this might be the most consistent meta I've seen for this as an opener. I also tried Summer Harvest which is a perfectly viable alternative, but I found myself opening with it into Trading with the Pentoshi and literally having more gold than I could spend, thus bringing me to realize if people are playing plots like those I would rather Naval them. Summer Harvest is a safer pick though since it does not whiff against things like Time of Plenty.
  • Heads on Spikes: More power gain + hand pressure + good stats.
  • Weapons at the Door: A necessary card as you may otherwise lack in attachment control and attachments stop your The Seastone Chair. More attachment control for the deck on top of this would probably not be unreasonable.
  • Return to the Fields (R): A card that was included to respond to Valar Morghulis.
  • Valar Dohaeris: Duh, although I actually found myself trying to use it as a response to Valar Morghulis more than anything else. So maybe you could replace it with something else.
  • Rise of the Kraken: This seemed like an obvious plot, and while I think it is a fine pick, this is where I would likely say there is a "flex" spot. It could be Counting Coppers, Close Call, Marched to the Wall, or whatever else you might prefer.

As mentioned here, a big potential weakness of this deck is simply dying to Valar Morghulis. I included little card draw due to wanting the agenda to be my draw, however if they kill all your guys with Valar Morghulis, all of those attachments go away so there goes your "hand." The large amount of multiples also means it is plenty likely you will be stuck topdecking dead characters. So you want to play with this threat in mind and be ready to use Return to the Fields (R) if you think it is coming. Even if they don't flip it, you delayed for a turn so you have more chances to draw into duplicates. This is also why I have included 3 copies of Hagen's Daughter as her combined claim soak + Valar survival abilities are very valuable. You should also value playing cards from under your fools instead of from your hand for this reason. The strength increase to your fools is typically not relevant due to the many effects that will cause unopposed challenges.

Other plot options are basically whether you want to put in more big characters hate or tech against attrition decks. Duel and The Father are examples of big character hate (although The Father has 0 initiative and anti-synergy with some of the deck's mechanics) while attrition tech would probably involve running fewer multiples to avoid drawing copies of dead chars + more draw, so things like Counting Coppers, Siege Preparations or a second Return to the Fields (R). Attachment control is also not unreasonable to pursue more of if you are really scared of voltron or Valyrian Steel (R) or the like, you could try The Pointy End which can always double to simply remove dupes from the opponent.

The characters in this deck are mostly set, but there is some flexibility with the spots taken by Begging Brother and Acolyte of the Waves. There are plenty of viable options here such as Drowned God Fanatic (R), King's Landing Smuggler, Lordsport Shipwright, whatever floats your boat. Other than that I think the draw deck is mostly self-explanatory and does not need much discussion. Notably absent is Ser Dontos Hollard because of his annoying "No attachments except Weapon" keyword which blocks Support of Harlaw. You could probably use him if you want but just be aware that he will block this attachment on Patchface and potentially more if you are spreading gold with Shagwell out, and even cause it to be discarded if you marshal him out while it's attached to a fool who will then gain his "no attachments" keyword.

A couple of notes about counters to this deck: You will probably die to First Snow of Winter, and Burn. I won’t say that these are impossible to beat, but it’s going to be quite an uphill battle, and I don’t know that there is very much you can do about it. Pray that you draw all your dupes against First Snow, or get that miracle hit with Head on Spikes on Drogon (R). If you wanted to tech against Burn, use The Hand's Judgment and Ghost of High Heart (note that despite the total lack of Brotherhood tech, the deck just happens to have no loyal characters, so you can throw in something like The Hollow Hill if you want). But dying to these is probably just an inevitability with a deck that only uses characters of 3 cost or below, in my opinion. To try to stop The First Snow of Winter, you can try and sniff it out with Forgotten Plans, and the plot is such a silver bullet that I wouldn't blame you for trying.

One last note to be aware of is that you can marshal duplicates of Penny or Hagen's Daughter into shadows to activate Penny's ability, if needed.

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